Do you believe ‚love at first sight‘ truly exists? If yes, you might have a rethink after reading my personal anecdote.
You. Me. A hand-packed picnic, a bottle of wine, some finger food and a blanket for two. Let’s see if this is more than an intense crush. – Unknown
In the cool of this evening, I’m sitting here on my couch, home alone. A thought crossed my mind and I decided to write about it: February is widely regarded as the ‚month of love‘. Is there really a thing like love at first sight? Oftentimes, when couples are quizzed how they met, they’ll smile and glance romantically at the sky like they want to relive the experience and say, „Oh, we met in the cafeteria in school and the moment I set my eyes on him/her, I knew there was something special about him/her. It was love at first sight. Indeed, it was a match made in heaven.“ Some even say, „He sent me a PM on FB saying, ‚hello‘. Then, I looked at his profile picture and voila, I felt my heart skip a beat. It was a magical experience. it was love at first sight blah blah blah.“ Now, my question is: is there really a love at first sight experience or is it a low-level infatuation? Read on.
Before you give your thoughts on the topic, I’d like to tell you a short story from my past. Just relax as we go back to 2013.
In June, 2013 after my graduation, I was deployed to do my mandatory one-year national service programme in a very rural area in a Northern Nigerian state. During my sojourn in the village, I became a chorister in a Christian fellowship – for the record, I’m a very gifted singer. When I sing, the angels turn around and ask, „Who’s that?“ Yeah, I’m that good and I’ve won all the Grammy’s: in the bathroom, of course. In reality, I sing terribly and sound like a baby croc: I don’t even know what that sounds like. Now, back to the story: we organised a big concert to be hosted in the largest church in the village since we invited the locals. During the run-up to the event, rehearsal were great and I was excited about the whole thing but couldn’t participate because I fell ill.
Finally, the D-day came but I couldn’t join the choir – you already know why. Instead of sitting in the congregation, an overzealous me decided to take up the ushering role at the door post, welcoming and taking inventory of guests. As the choir churned out exhilarating tunes, I spotted a beautiful brown-skinned girl dancing in the crowd – I’ll call her Brittany. She wore a red dress – patterned with white polka dots – reaching just above her knees. I still remember that dress even though I never saw her in that dress again.
I was enthralled at how she danced with so much gung-ho, and she had a very lovely smile as she kept flashing her diastema. I was instantly attracted to her. I fixed my gaze at her and didn’t flicker for a second. After the dancing was over, she came outside with her friend, who I’ll call Andrea. I was also outside with a friend and courteously asked, „Are you ladies leaving?“ A bloke like me wasn’t interested in if she was leaving. I only wanted to know if the time was right to make an introduction. „Oh, no. We just want to take a walk. We’ll be right back,“ was her response, smilingly. I and my friend reciprocated the smile as they waltzed off. Immediately, we did what every other pair of guys would do and quickly picked our choices: My friend was like, „I’ll take the dark one (the crown jewel of this story).“ With a reticent countenance, I said, „I’ll take the other one,“ but in my mind, I clenched my fist, growled and was like, „Grr! No way,“ just like the way it’s done in cartoons. Unfortunately or perhaps fortunately for me, the girls didn’t return.
A few months later, I met Brittany on the street and asked for her friend’s number. She declined saying she’d have to get her friend’s permission first. She dialled the number but it didn’t connect. To this day, I’m unsure if she really called her friend. Long story cut short, I coincidentally met Brittany when I went grocery shopping weeks later. We finally exchanged numbers and set up a date for Friday, that week. Come Friday, I asked her out and she said yes.
I did like her. She was a free-spirited and an interesting person and I think she loved me. We went on a couple of more dates and I found out she wasn’t meant for me. We had contrasting beliefs, personalities and dreams and we didn’t connect on a level I’d wanted us to. It felt like I was attracted to this person and when reality dawned on me, I discovered it was all an illusion.
I was indeed attracted to her right from the start but it wasn’t love. This takes us back to the question: is there truly love at first sight? If things had worked out and we eventually got married, I probably would’ve told everyone it was love at first sight. In my opinion, this cliche is actually a feeling of attraction as a result of a first striking impression. I don’t think there’s anything like love at first sight.
The Grand Debate
I’d like to know your thoughts on this topic, whether you support or are against me. Feel free to share your opinion and your experience. And if you convince me that love at first sight exists, I might jump ship. Share this article so we’ll get to know what others think about this topic.
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